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December 24, 2011

It’s a Boy!

Masculinity is so hard to define. Yet, when I experience it or see it the feeling is so palpable. Perhaps it’s a reflection of my own issues with my dad, but the Daddy/boy relationship has had a particular strong draw on me. The intensity of a strong, protective daddy coupled with an adoring boy combines all that is magic about masculinity, love and power.

Wonderful surprises happen when you least expect them. I met Scratch at a Black Leather Wings party. The connection I immediately felt was palpable. He asked me about developing a Daddy/boy relationship. Of course, I agreed! he is an amazing boy!

Right after I agreed, I suddenly realized that I’ve never done this before. What if I didn’t do it right? What was a daddy supposed to do? How do I add a boy to my existing relationship? Oh shit! My self doubts came up. But I also knew that I had to put them aside. I’ve received so much healing at the hands of other daddies, I instinctively knew I needed to explore daddy too.

Scratch makes me smile. I have the opportunity to share my experiences with my boy. In many ways I get the privilege of being the daddy I wish I had biologically. I get to help him while at the same time, I push him to continue his own journey. We talk about his dreams. I offer suggestions and perspective. I support him. He also supports me. I’ve realized that it’s ok to confess when I don’t have the answers. We can figure them out together.

What more perfect arena is there to express masculine love than in a Daddy/boy relationship? Our physical intimacies are spiritual. We naturally transcend traditional top/bottom roles. Both of us easily switch roles. Daddy/boy is a mindstate – for us it really doesn’t have much to do with power dynamics. It’s an exchange of primal masculine energy that comes not only from our penises and assholes, but also comes from our hearts.

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