“Success isn’t the result of spontaneous combustion. You must set yourself on fire.”
I saw this on a t-shirt someone was wearing at O’Hare airport while I was changing planes over the weekend. I was coming back from Easton Mountain where I was part of an amazing team of men leading a week of workshops on being erotically conscious. I liked the quote on this shirt because it reminded me of my belief that we must all set ourselves on fire to get what we want in life.
Whether it’s Eros, or career, or relationships, or any other aspect of life the common thread is that fire we create for ourselves. It’s so easy to complain about things that are missing or things we want more of in life. Yet, often when we examine what we’re looking for the one key ingredient missing is that fire or passion. We just expect things to automatically happen and we’re surprised when those things don’t happen the way we want.
Looking at our erotic life can be a useful window into finding that fire for each of us. How do we interact erotically in ways that are safe and fulfilling? Eros has the potential to offer us great gifts of connection with self and others and the sense of the divine in all. Yet, many of us only see the surface of Eros – the sexual act. When we can find ways to dive deeper to see all the parallel paths that Eros has to offer, we can begin to see infinitely expanding possibilities and the intersection of Eros and spirit. The best place to begin is to become aware of the power of intention. In other words, become clear on what you want and why you want it.
When things aren’t going the way you want a place to look is your own fire. Are you creating and tending the fire to give yourself the things you want out of life or are you expecting spontaneous combustion?