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conscious sexuality

Acceptance

Since most of us struggle with periods of self-hatred, bad body images, shame and confusion over sex and pleasure, I recommend having a hot love affair with yourself. Sexual healing begins by learning how to turn yourself on, discovering your sexual fantasies, and giving yourself an abundance of selflove and orgasms. Betty Dodson Gay men […]

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Gooning

As I learned to keep edging, I discovered a new sensation while bating. I came to find it called gooning and I describe it as a state where my head goes quiet and all I’m aware of is raw, primal sensation. Words no longer have any meaning; instead, my sounds become animalistic – moans, grunts, […]

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Masturbation as Ritual

I look at masturbation not as something to do; rather, I look at it as a practice. It’s a way to temporarily shut off the world and focus entirely on me and my connection with myself. There’s nothing else I can do to feel as alive, joyful, and grounded as when I am masturbating. I […]

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I’m Not A Walking Penis (Most of the Time)

I recently came across this post where the author made a case our culture doesn’t understand the male sex drive. There’s a pernicious myth out there that the male sex drive is unstoppable and irresistible–that once a man is aroused, he literally cannot control his actions.  We tell jokes about “thinking with the other head” and “all the […]

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Slowing Down

Men are often like puppies. OK, not in all ways, but many of us are like puppies in one important way. We get super excited about the prospect of sex. We want to dive right in head first – sometimes without checking the water. We learn to get excited starting when we’re young. Think about […]

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Practicing My Boundaries

The biggest challenges with my move to Vegas has been leaving my friends and lovers behind and setting out to find a new circle of friends here. Like most guys looking for play partners, I’m on several online hookup sites; generally I find these sites useful and I’ve met several great guys who have turned […]

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Ritual

My boy recently moved to a new city and is going through all the expected challenges in adapting to a new location. In addition, we’ve been separated more than usual over the last few weeks and, while the distance has brought us closer, it’s also added some challenges. Like a good Daddy, I want to […]

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Reboot

seeded mirror

It’s been a particularly challenging week and I realized that I needed an evening to be in my body and let go of my mental noise. I made a date with myself for the evening. I’ve found that I need to schedule time for myself lately; yes, it’s a strange feeling for me to schedule […]

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Genital Shame

Junk. What did that term become popular? I’m sorry but neither my penis, my balls nor even my asshole is junk. Culturally we seem to have three primary ways of referring to our genitals: clinical, vulgar or cute. I really don’t like any of these but I’ve settled on clinical. Cute terms are just too […]

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