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Sacred Touch for Men Relax your body. Reclaim your pleasure. Find your passion.

Left Brain/Right Brain

Posted by ed on February 17, 2012
Posted in Gay life  | Tagged With: , | No Comments yet, please leave one

Yesterday was an interesting day. One of the things I had to do was to update my bodywork bio and send that to Easton Mountain since I am directing Kinky Camp this year. As I wrote the bio I was reflecting on the mix of left and right brain that is my life.

The right brain is holistic. It is where intuittion comes from. I use my right brain during bodywork. The left brain is focused on solving problems. It’s where logic comes from. I use my left brain when I’m writing code for a website.

Yesterday was a perfect example of this left/right brain mix. I started the day with a phone call  on a website redesign. After this call I had to head over to south of market for a porn shoot. At this shoot, I tortured and milked a 20-something kid for 2 hours! I had him tied up and loved seeing him moan and whimper with delight (and a bit of torture too!) This shoot is for a new line of kink videos they’re working on. After the shoot, I came back home to see a client helping him reconnect with his erotic self. Nothing like helping a guy reconnect with Eros after milking the kid for a few hours! Whew! The I switched into my tech hat again and headed downtown to Taproot. I’ve been offering my web development skills pro bono to non-profits through Taproot and gave a presentation to a group of other volunteers on the web development project implications when using WordPress to develop websites. Yep, geeky indeed! After that I rushed back home to finish out the day seeing a bodywork client. I capped the evening off with a few slices of pizza and a glass of wine. Boy, talk about a left/right brain mix!

This mix of using both parts of me gives me balance. I can understand and appreciate multiple ways of looking at something. It also forces me to be present. Bouncing back and forth requires me to really focus on what’s going on in the present moment. It’s so important yet so hard to do. Living my life in this manner helps reinforce the power of simply being present.

Performance

Posted by ed on February 2, 2012
Posted in conscious sexuality  | Tagged With: , , | 1 Comment

Last night I celebrated the pagan holiday of Imbolc with a Radical Faerie circle jerk. Although it was a very intentional and ritualized experience it was also a circle jerk – which, of course, means having to perform.

Why is it that every time a group of men get together we I have to somehow find a way to compete and perform? Even if the space is set up specifically to NOT have to compete and perform. The conditioning for competition is so deep that we do it to ourselves even if there’s no reason for it.

The space was very celebratory and loving, yet I found myself in my head as the ritual began all around performing. What if I didn’t get hard? What if I didn’t do it ‘right’? What if I did it too ‘right’? Sometimes I just wish I could find that damn off switch and shut my mind off!

Of course, I wasn’t surprised by the irony in this situation. Here I was masturbating – usually a way for me to shut my mind off – finding that I couldn’t shut my mind off. I decided to give myself permission to be myself. I retreated – on purpose. I found a space in the room that was toward the back and somewhat away from all the activity and just focused on my breath and my body. I closed my eyes. I listened to my body.

Low and behold, it started to work. My mind slowed down. I took in my breath. I took in the energy of the other men in the room and let go of having to do anything with that energy. I let go of that damned internal programming around competition and simply got present – first with my breath, then my body and then the space around me.

I then moved about the room. My Beast came out to play. He danced with other beasts. He felt the group energy. My beast learned the importance of not having to be anything other than himself.

Been thinking a lot lately about the differences between unfocused anger and focused revolution and how this impacts being a leader. Check out the February newsletter.